Hark how the bells...

Here's a little update on how things are going. In a nutshell, I still don't smoke, and other people still smell.

In other news: Today was for many people, the last full day of Christmas shopping (not including the drunken menfolk who pop in to Ann Summers on Christmas Eve to buy probably ill fitting lingerie for their soon to be ex-girlfriends...) and didn't everybody know it! All the reluctant shoppers were out in force, the kind who are so flabbergasted with the amount of choices available that they end up grabbing the first thing they saw (after staring at everything else in the shop for a very even three minutes each) and wandering home in a daze, swearing off all forms of shopping until next year. Thank God for Internet food shopping, is all I say, in the olden days those kinds of people were simply forced to hibernate for most of the year.

So I was browsing the pre-packaged pyjamas sets in Peacocks, dimly aware of being sandwiched in by 5 packs of pastel underwears on the right, and a jungle of monstrously fluffy dressingowns behind me, when a tall, bald man shuffles up to the left of me and eyes up the 18-20 cupcake jimmy jams on my right side. It's a bit of a pickle, I'm not quite decided between the yellow penguin set or the more traditional red tartan, but his body language is certainly hinting for me to move and the desperate look in his eye tells me that he's not about to wait around for me to make a decision. He bravely attempts to circumnavigate the fluffy jungle, unfortunately forcing me to walk as far into the hanging packs of pyjamas as possible, in serious danger of reaching some form of nightwear Narnia. His steely determination to grasp the soft terry towelling of the pink cupcake print pyjamas makes me wonder whether in fact they were not destined for a rather particular female at home, but to keep this decidedly awkward man roasty toasty on cold winter nights...

Having decided this was a far better conclusion for his behaviour, I extricated myself from the plastic pyjama set cover I had inadvertantly become stuck to, and took my leave of the shop.




Then apparently impulse bought out of spite.

The rest of the days activities were far less eventful (and thankfully, far less awkward) but I dd manage to get a vegan roast stuffed with cranberries and wild rice for my Xmas meal, and some non-alcoholic mulled wine. Not that I've particularly given up alcohol, but after reading the "morning after" facebook updates of the Saturday night party goers, it's nice to have something else to reach for. Reading the hungover facebook chaos is like experiencing a tiny drunken version of a Christmas Carol, featuring Friend A as the ghost of that glass of wine yet to come, and you as...Bob Crachet, or Kermit the Frog, Im not sure. Either way, you don't die but you do discover the meaning of Christmas.

Yeah.

Speaking of the meaning of Christmas (how convenient!) for a lot if people this means family. Whether this is the family you were born with, or the one you were lucky enough to pick up on the way, one of the great things about Christmas time is being able to enjoy the company of other people. I spent yesterday with a lot of family, catching up, eating food (a worthy Xmas tradition) and practising some sign language - my Uncle's partner is deaf, so there's a lot of BSL communication going on - and by the end of the night I was reminded of how good it is to spend some quality time with your family. I wish I could spend more time with the friends I consider family but alas, until I pass my driving test that won't happen too often!

The other major happening around this time of year is New Years...how are you going to spend yours? This year instead of working at the pub (which has been how the last couple were spent) I'm heading down to Crawley to hang out with a good friend of mine. We're staying in and watching Supernatural, surrounded by platters of home cooked goodies to nibble on, whilst doggysitting her aunties pooch. I seriously can't wait...there's something to be said for good company and great programming instead of drinking your entire bodyweight in rum and cursing the entrance of the new year.

And there you have another update. Never fear, for there will be more, and they will contain stories far better than bald men and pyjamas. Next post will feature a spotlight on up and coming fashion company Kiss Me Quick Boutique as they host their first clothes party in the historic town of Worcester (visit their website at www.kissmequickboutique.co.uk for a sneak preview of their lovely clothes) and also to come will be a step by step guide to a vegan's Christmas dinner. Mayhem! Clothes! Sprouts! Don't miss it.

Friends, Romans, Geeks...

Welcome...big plans are in place for this blog. No longer need you wonder what I had for dinner last night, or what my opinions are on the burning issues of today (they range from the apathetic to the mildly awkward) or even of yesteryear (did secondary school ruin my grammar skills, or were it Buffy the Vampire Slayer?).

Everybody should have a blog. Think how much more exciting life would be if it imitated the blogging world! School children invading your public transport? Unfollow. Someone shortchanges you at a shop? Delete. Sadly, we live in a world where we actually have to deal with our problems, and reacting to situations with a long and heated monologue filled with rhetorical questions (plus an introduction and conclusion) is generally frowned upon.

So with this being an introduction to my own personal collection of monologues, here's a condensed and highly biased rundown of what the life of Count Jerkula is really like...

I quit smoking a month ago. I like the fact that I don't smell of smoke anymore, but hate that I can now smell everybody else. Ignorance really is bliss. Every so often I like to cook, and I promise myself that I'll do it more often but sadly lose motivation after a week or so...but still, never stop trying! I've tried going vegan a couple of times before and one day it will stick... I was raised on Buffy and now co-habit comfortably with Supernatural. Everytime I fill out my occupation on forms as "Administrator", I die a little on the inside. My favourite artist is a Detroit maestro by the name of Spencer Bell, who passed away in December of 2006 of adrenal cancer yet still continues to inspire people every day with his music and the fantastic tales from his family and friends (check out www.spencerbellmemorial.com to meet your new hero!). My second favourite artist is myself, because I have no other source of publicity.

Www.myspace.com/leahaworth

Yay!

Aside from all that, my days are filled with working in an office, learning to drive, writing stories and doodling. Much, MUCH doodling. So stick around, and who knows what invaluable gems of wisdom might be found? Probably none, but we can pass the time with a tale or two anyway.